Ali stood silently,looking at the door.With a slow creaking sound it opened.Talking a deep breath,Ali walked inside. Inside it was freezing cold,full of rocks and some mining pickaxes. Ali knew where he was,he was in the ghost mine.Bravly Ali walked deeper into the mine, as he did so he saw a ghost ,werewolfs, zoblie and clyopes. he was petrfied,will I ever get out?,he thought to himself.
This is a really exciting piece of work Kieran. You could go into edit posts and put speech marks into this. It would uplevel your work dramatically. Well done though - It is so scary! Mrs S.
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